ABOUT ME
you cannot know anything about me. otherwise you will use it against me. don't say that you won't. everyone is suspect. big brother is watching.

ABOUT MY FAMILY
i am just kidding. i am not really a conspiracy theorist. but i like to make fun of them.
if you are at this page, you probably already know me. so i will just say a few things about me just in case.
i have no family, at least that i will acknowledge. except my brother, the family idiot\iguana boy, whom i like to affectionately call "quit humping the couch, idiot iguana boy!"

FRIENDS
my friends all rock it proper, baby! especially 2nd floor! okay, okay, 3rd floor's, well, okay, they're cool too. i guess. by the way, i stole that expression (see first sentence) from one of my friends. we are way cool. especially the amazon goddess in us all. i love you all, mwuh :-* kiss kiss. even when you dress like britney spears. or date guys that where pink pants. pink pants. thats okay, britty, we love you anyway!
i want to thank all the little people i stepped on along the way, especially the fat ones, they were nice and soft to walk on. no i'm just kidding. and remember, there's a skinny person inside us all. and most importantly, speed kills, do depressants.

FUN POTATO SAYINGS

eat your potato
is it mealy?
sweetpotato
no potatos were harmed in the making of this (fill in something here)
theres a full potato out tonight
je voudrais un potato
bow to the mighty power of the potato. the potato will rule the turtle. the turtle cannot hope to win!

HOBBIES, ETC.
in my spare time i enjoy the company of potatos. i also collect religious pamphlets and empty three-ring binders.
turnons: long walks under the stars, octopi mating rituals, mashed potatos, creamy ones, without lumps, Terminator 2: judgement day,and pikachu
turnoffs: baby pictures, lumpy mashed potatos, bulbosaur, and long walks under the stars.
anything else you dont really need to know. youre all against me! i know it! i feel your beady little eyes upon me! but i will have my revenge! i will eliminate you all, then IIIII will have the POWER!!!!! BY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL... no, wait. wrong cartoon. sorry about that. i meant, THEN I WILL RULE THE WORLD HUWA HA HA HA HA HA!!!